It's 2020! What the hell. 2020 used to be the year I never imagined would come. The year the world would end. The year that seemed so so far away.
Well, nothing like that happened and here I am writing my first blog post after 3 years. Lots has happened in the past 3 years. More than anything, I've grown up. Experiences in life can teach you a lot.
Well over the last 3 years I lost my grandmother who I was extremely close to. I faced 2 huge health scares one related to my mother and the other to my father. I moved on from things I was holding on to which were of no significance to me anymore and more than anything else I moved on from saying yes to things I actually wanted to say no to.
I often find myself like a fish out of water in this complicated world. Like I don't fit in. It is manipulative, competitive and we are constantly using every ounce of our energy to run after things which I'm not sure we even want.
I crawled through my first 10k few weeks ago. I've never been into running. Ever! If you know me you would know that forget running, I wouldn't even walk unless I really had to. I have to be super honest with you. I signed up for this 10k somewhere around mid 2019 and then forgot all about it..
On November 1st 2019 for many reasons that I do not really want to get in to but for no fault of mine I was described by someone who I once held dear with the choicest of adjectives which I never imagined to be used to describe me. Except for one word that was indeed true among all the lies. "Unfit". That hit me so hard that I signed up with my nutritionist, got a personal trainer and got things going for me in the right direction. However, there was always this heavy weight on my chest and I could not get all those words out of my mind for I knew that I was not any of those things that were used to describe me. There were times I wanted to scream my side of the story and tell everyone the real truth but I decided against it. Those who have to stick with me will. Those who don't aren't worth the convincing anyway.
During these days I also ended up having a lot more free time with the year ending, Christmas holidays etc. So, I decided to give running a shot. Initially, I struggled to even walk. My feet used to burn in like 15 minutes and I thought I would die from all the pain. But slowly I started picking up the rhythm, I started feeling that it was like the therapy I needed. My very close friends started encouraging me, Hell they even signed up for a 10k just so that they could walk besides me to support me. And this is inspite of going through surgeries and cancelling attending weddings. Close friends that were running triple the distance I was constantly motivated and believed in me more than I believed in myself
That's when I realized I had to do this. For them but also most importantly for me. Not to show the person who described me using those negative adjectives or who compared me to someone new like I was an old car ready to be junked but for me to show myself that I was capable of what seemed the impossible in my life
And I did...
Well, nothing like that happened and here I am writing my first blog post after 3 years. Lots has happened in the past 3 years. More than anything, I've grown up. Experiences in life can teach you a lot.
Well over the last 3 years I lost my grandmother who I was extremely close to. I faced 2 huge health scares one related to my mother and the other to my father. I moved on from things I was holding on to which were of no significance to me anymore and more than anything else I moved on from saying yes to things I actually wanted to say no to.
I often find myself like a fish out of water in this complicated world. Like I don't fit in. It is manipulative, competitive and we are constantly using every ounce of our energy to run after things which I'm not sure we even want.
I crawled through my first 10k few weeks ago. I've never been into running. Ever! If you know me you would know that forget running, I wouldn't even walk unless I really had to. I have to be super honest with you. I signed up for this 10k somewhere around mid 2019 and then forgot all about it..
On November 1st 2019 for many reasons that I do not really want to get in to but for no fault of mine I was described by someone who I once held dear with the choicest of adjectives which I never imagined to be used to describe me. Except for one word that was indeed true among all the lies. "Unfit". That hit me so hard that I signed up with my nutritionist, got a personal trainer and got things going for me in the right direction. However, there was always this heavy weight on my chest and I could not get all those words out of my mind for I knew that I was not any of those things that were used to describe me. There were times I wanted to scream my side of the story and tell everyone the real truth but I decided against it. Those who have to stick with me will. Those who don't aren't worth the convincing anyway.
During these days I also ended up having a lot more free time with the year ending, Christmas holidays etc. So, I decided to give running a shot. Initially, I struggled to even walk. My feet used to burn in like 15 minutes and I thought I would die from all the pain. But slowly I started picking up the rhythm, I started feeling that it was like the therapy I needed. My very close friends started encouraging me, Hell they even signed up for a 10k just so that they could walk besides me to support me. And this is inspite of going through surgeries and cancelling attending weddings. Close friends that were running triple the distance I was constantly motivated and believed in me more than I believed in myself
That's when I realized I had to do this. For them but also most importantly for me. Not to show the person who described me using those negative adjectives or who compared me to someone new like I was an old car ready to be junked but for me to show myself that I was capable of what seemed the impossible in my life
And I did...
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